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smallsquid 36 男性
1  文章
老司機啊!   2019-03-26

平常工作我們就有在聽電臺的習慣。 途中聽到了一則廣告,內容大約是這樣的… GO GO GO 阿雷阿雷啊勒~ 。 (以上省略30字) 媽媽:什麼GO GO GO 不要胡鬧快去整理房間 妹妹:媽媽 你不知道嗎?現在加入XX假期,可以抽gogoro2欸! (以下省略20字) <br><br> ...


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
tess3972 44 女性
3  文章
funny joke make you happy   2018-12-29

One day a mosquito and a mantis went to peek at a woman's bath. The mosquito proudly said, "Ten years ago I bit her in front of the chest and now it's so swollen. The Mantis said unconvinced, "What's that? Ten years ago, I cut her between her legs, and now it bleeds every month."


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
line2018530 35 男性
2  文章
3p   2018-07-07

他總是棄而不捨的邀約,在每一個看似有可趁之機的時候。我並不反對這樣子的互動,畢竟讓女人有被追逐、仰慕的感覺,也是種保持青春的秘訣。於是,在餐敘之後,她難得同意再一起去開房間。 <br><br> ...


0 評論, 3 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,2.42 分數
line2018530 35 男性
2  文章
公司小妹   2018-07-07

某天一如往常出差累得半死回家 開啟APP無聊亂滑一下 聊到一個妹,話題很對頭不說,重點是比我還飢渴.. 先叫她Alice吧 Alice在外商公司上班,照片上看起來的樣子是聰明又漂亮的女孩子 這樣的女孩在北部到處都是,可是要吃到可不容易 我在北 ...


0 評論, 2 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
HuanxuLin69 34 男性
0  文章
心血來潮~來個大野狼裝~增加情趣~YA.......但是卻是悲劇的結局   2016-12-28

我在上班的時候跟前女朋友講電話,但我們講電話過程中起了爭執,後來為了讓我們感覺別因為爭執而壞了感情,於是我去買了一套大野狼裝,想說回去帶點情趣回去跟她泥補一下感情,當然我一到家洗完澡立換上我為她準備的大野狼裝,從廁所出來後.....

...


1 評論, 17 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,2.49 分數
我的人生 我的選擇   2016-08-25

已經如此有成就的人,面對有限生命仍這麼努力活著,

幸運能夠揮霍人生的我們,是否該學到些什麼呢?

有時候已經不是努力或不努力的問題

真的就是差了一點運氣和機運

大膽奴才!朕的舌頭你也敢玩

【 思 悟 】

且惜好時光

珍重各自安

...


1 評論, 6 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.86 分數
Linking5168 33 女性
1  文章
約三個各一次,還是一人可以三次   2016-02-20

因為好奇 所以有一天挑選一位照片傳來相當勇猛的帥哥(應該,可能,也許算是吧),沒看到臉! 只看到 "恩"! 我就問他這個問題, 原始的問題是這樣的: 我問妳喔 , 如果有兩種狀況讓你選 , 你會選哪一種? A:我約三個人, 每一個人輪流一次 B:我約妳一個, 但是2小時內你要來參次

他回答: ...


7 評論, 49 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,5.44 分數
namcoland 51 男性
33  文章
男人哪個部位最性感?   2015-12-10

男人哪個部位最性感?第一名竟然是... 轉貼自NOWnews

男人的哪個部位最性感?西伊利諾伊大學進行一項調查「女性對男性身體哪個部位的視覺效果最強大」,依序為你排名。

...


0 評論, 8 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.86 分數
namcoland 51 男性
33  文章
女人最愛搜的前十名色情關鍵字竟然是   2015-11-06

女人最愛搜的前十名色情關鍵字竟然是?

...


3 評論, 21 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,3.92 分數
namcoland 51 男性
33  文章
修陰毛   2015-10-04

之前在某台灣&美國的部落格 看到關於修陰毛一事 前一陣子自己也試了一下 不過不敢全修光

陰毛修短了後. 不會被包皮夾到了!!


0 評論, 5 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,2.42 分數
cutbas 27 男性
32  文章
約砲方法 一   2015-07-18

這是我自己的經驗啦

小弟是個想像力極度豐富的人

可以從海洋聯到路上接著到天上 外太空

我是用暗示的

就是聊天中開始畫虎爛

有事沒事加點性暗示

如果對方也想要

會一起跟你進來你想像出來的情境裡

舉例好了

突然聊到體操

...


1 評論, 37 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,4.39 分數
moneychan17 33 男性
2  文章
請問各位男/女生妳們都喜歡什麼類型的異性阿   2015-07-17

各位大大妳們好~我很想知道各位喜歡的異性著眼在甚麼地方跟類型~順便看看異性跟同性的人都喜歡甚麼樣子的~因為我感覺我有點怪怪的~我竟然喜歡肉感型的女孩子.....因為抱起來很舒服說.......但是也不能太誇張......不知道有沒有人跟偶一樣呢?


2 評論, 10 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.45 分數
rm_fkkkk00005 25 男性
5  文章
目前大學生,有需要可以找我喔@@也可以找我唱唱歌囉0973188882line   2015-04-04

終於找到借口趁著醉意上心頭 表達我所有感受 寂寞漸濃 沉默留在舞池角落 你說的太少或太多 都會讓人更惶恐 誰任由誰放縱 誰會先讓出自由 最後一定總是我 雙腳懸空 在你冷酷熱情間遊走 被侵佔所有還要笑著接受 我嫉妒你的愛 氣勢如虹 像個人氣高居不下的天后 你要的不是我 而是一種虛榮 ...


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
rm_fkkkk00005 25 男性
5  文章
目前大學生,有需要可以找我喔@@也可以找我唱唱歌囉0973188882line   2015-04-04

終於找到借口趁著醉意上心頭 表達我所有感受 寂寞漸濃 沉默留在舞池角落 你說的太少或太多 都會讓人更惶恐 誰任由誰放縱 誰會先讓出自由 最後一定總是我 雙腳懸空 在你冷酷熱情間遊走 被侵佔所有還要笑著接受 我嫉妒你的愛 氣勢如虹 像個人氣高居不下的天后 你要的不是我 而是一種虛榮 ...


0 評論, 1 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
frogmans 47 男性
11  文章
愚人節   2015-04-01

ㄟ先說好,今天不可以整我喔 祝大家有個愉快的愚人節!!

哈哈


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
menjames 34 男性
1  文章
內褲与手套   2015-01-12

絞盡腦汁想送個適合的禮物,   左思右想後他覺得送一雙手套應該是個很好的選擇,   因為最近常有寒流,而且女友蠻怕冷的,   送手套可以顯出自己的體貼,   再附上一封言情並茂的卡片,一定可以打動女友的心扉。      ...


2 評論, 15 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.86 分數
cutbas 27 男性
32  文章
幻想幹著公司的工讀生   2014-10-06

我們公司那個工讀生已經過一陣子了,目前還是學生,長的滿可愛的,皮膚白皙,

說話有點傻傻的感覺,還滿好笑的,因為辦公室在不同樓層,其實滿少有機會和她

說話,人還滿好相處的,真的好想要跟她來一砲喔,地點就在辦公室監視器看不到

的角落,光想都覺得刺激呢


1 評論, 22 瀏覽次數, 0 票
cutbas 27 男性
32  文章
女生都喜歡幽默嗎   2014-10-02

我常常跟女生聊天

都加了幽默的性暗示

感覺她們的接受度都還滿高的耶

女生可以說說你們的想法嗎

好讓我們改進


0 評論, 5 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,3.70 分數
littlewo 38 男性
2  文章
導火線   2014-08-27

阿明脫掉衣服給女友看他腹部的六塊肌! 並驕傲的說:這相當於五十公斤的炸藥! 然後又轉身展現他的二頭肌! 又驕傲的說:這相當於一百公斤的炸藥! 接著脫掉內褲................................ ....................................... ............................... 只見女友奪門狂奔...........! ...


1 評論, 15 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.45 分數
littlewo 38 男性
2  文章
爸爸的九大夢想   2014-08-27

一想小姐坐檯免費, 二想三妻四妾無罪, 三想天天做愛不累, 四想靚女夜夜陪睡, 五想吃喝嫖賭全會, 六想餐餐山珍海味, 七想喝酒千杯不醉, 八想無病長命百歲, 九想終身榮華富貴。


0 評論, 8 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
rm_s979310 42 男性
1  文章
吃魚經驗   2014-08-25

第一節課-拉丁之舞

老師說,你先坐在這邊,我先示範一下...... 音樂放下去,老師一面搖一邊勾著我的脖子 時而正面時而反面,有時跨坐到我的腿上,並不經意的用胸部摩擦著我的胸膛 伴隨著音樂及肢體動作,身上的衣物一件件的滑落,股間不聽話的人蔘一吋吋的增大 ...


1 評論, 19 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,3.92 分數
999boss999 48 男性
5  文章
看看笑笑   2014-08-14

單戀了一各女生 但是不敢表白 一天比一天難過 就去看心理醫生希望能得到解答 跟醫生談完話 我問應該怎麼辦 醫生說不去想或是去表白 我說就是沒自信去表白阿 不然怎會來看你(醫生) 醫生說不然就轉移目標 於是我和醫生同時轉頭去看看旁邊ㄉ護士 護士跟我們互忘了一眼 說了句 我有男友了 ...


0 評論, 8 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
Y_Duan 31 男性
5  文章
達抽不到水   2014-06-09

某一天一個房地產仲介員到南部出差,住進一家旅館,閒來無事,叫了一個風塵女郎。

雙方議價八千元成交,經過一陣翻雲覆雨之後,兩人都睡著了。

次日,女郎醒來後 ...


2 評論, 29 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,3.81 分數
Y_Duan 31 男性
5  文章
有位小姐   2014-06-09

有位小姐第一次和朋友去練習打高爾夫球。 發球時,她很用力的一揮,球被打歪了,竟然向著一群人飛過去,接著就看到一個男人應聲倒地,把兩手夾在大腿的中間,痛得滾下了山坡。 那位小姐上跑過去道歉,並且告訴傷患說她學過一些護理,希望能在救護車到達之前,先幫他檢查一下受傷的情形。 ...


1 評論, 23 瀏覽次數, 0 票
rm_StarCat0118 24 男性
8  文章
男人一生必玩的五種女人 轉貼!   2014-04-16

  作為男人,以下幾種女人有機會一定要嘗試嘗試,否則真是人生一大憾事!

  一、18歲左右的處女,關鍵是嫩和單純,那種感覺是成年女人所沒有的。

  二、學妹∼∼特指非商業的大學女生。

...


0 評論, 28 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.94 分數
W_Jesse 30 男性
6  文章
我帶妳去女生沒穿內衣的地方   2014-03-03

小華:我帶妳去一個女生沒有穿內衣的地方 小明:真的有這個地方喔? 小華:走,我們去幼稚園


2 評論, 26 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.45 分數
W_Jesse 30 男性
6  文章
如果想認識或是一起交流歡迎密我交朋友!!   2014-03-01

內容如題,我喜歡愛愛,但關係只限於那時段,其他時間就像朋友一樣!!我喜歡交朋友,待人和善,想要聊天的也歡迎密我。


0 評論, 11 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,2.42 分數
rm_xiaoancle 23 男性
1  文章
最近的辦公室姐姐   2013-11-11

辦公室姊姊幾位都來自台大日文系的, 尤其是一位快30歲的姐姐, 聲音真的很好聽, 人長得也還不錯, 重點是日文超級溜!

如果有生之年可以跟她來一砲 做鬼也甘願啦!!!!


4 評論, 42 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.80 分數
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
冷笑话!   2013-11-07

妻子在廚房裡忙著準備早餐~

丈夫在她的屁股上拍了一下~

說:「妳要是能把這搞硬,就不用穿提臀褲了。」妻子強忍著,沒搭理他~

第二天,他又在妻子的乳房上抓了一把,說:「妳要是能把這搞硬,就不用戴胸罩了。」~

...


2 評論, 36 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,4.06 分數
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
搞笑!   2013-11-07

1. 大象的左耳朵像什麼? ●右耳朵

2. 把一隻雞和一隻鵝同時放在冰山上,爲什麽雞死了鵝沒死? ●鵝是企鵝

3. 一年四季都盛開的花是什麽花? ●塑膠花

4. 什麼地方的路最窄? ●冤家路窄.

5. 什麼時候有人敲門,你絕不會說請進? ●在廁所裡

6. ...


0 評論, 14 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
真是一家人   2013-11-07

警車追逐一輛超速又橫衝直撞的小客車,終於追到路邊給攔了下來!





警察:「先生,你開那麼快,知道要被罰多少錢嗎?這些錢能用來做多少事,你知道嗎?」

駕駛:「我知道,它夠讓我去補習考駕照了!」

警察:「什麼!你無照駕駛?」

...


0 評論, 16 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
笑话!   2013-11-07

今天早晨特冷,姐妹兩個人去提款機領錢,正好遇見運鈔車來加鈔。 無奈之下兩人只好站在一旁苦苦等候,這時姐問我:凍手不? 我冷冷地回一句:凍手!結果四桿槍瞬間指向倆姐妹…… 兩個人被抓住送派出所,在路上我們一直沉默, ...


1 評論, 16 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
新语!   2013-11-07

1.我以後生個名字要叫“好帥”,那別人看到我就會說“好帥的爸爸”。

2.工作,退一步海闊天空,愛情,退一步人去樓空。

3.工作的最高境界就是看著別人上班,領著別人的工資。

4.錢不是問題,問題是沒錢!

5.喝醉了我誰也不服, 我就扶牆!

...


0 評論, 7 瀏覽次數, 0 票
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
一封驚心動魄的掛號信   2013-11-07

叮咚!叮咚!』 「誰啊!」 「掛號信!」 對講機裡傳來清晰的語聲,讓我不禁又緊張得直冒冷汗。 暗禱:『但願不是相同於上次的信件!』 我顫抖著從郵差手中接過信,頓時一顆心直往下沉,僅存的希望破滅了!打字的信封,讓你認不出是誰的筆跡;硬硬的內容,一摸便知是一張照片。 ...


0 評論, 10 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,3.12 分數
kent8885 31 男性
7  文章
hi^^   2013-11-03

If you like you can call me panda because my friends around me here call me panda, but of course I don’t look like a panda, I don’t have that big black eyes. My Chinese name is yu ze, you can also call me ze, ze in Chinese mean clever. I am so glad that you took your time to read my this letter, I do wish it will be the love bridge between us. I am so interested in western man and western ...


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
mmm0mike0 50 男性
14  文章
不要亂問   2011-08-03

女友給男友發短信:“老公你在幹嘛?在做夢嗎?把夢傳給我!在笑​嗎?把笑發過來!在哭嗎?短信你的眼淚讓我一起悲傷!”過了一會​,男友短信回覆道:“我在大便。”


6 評論, 101 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,3.17 分數
mmm0mike0 50 男性
14  文章
顛覆你心中的童話   2011-07-29

一天,一個女裁縫坐在河邊縫衣裳,一不小心她的頂針掉進河裡, 她傷心得大哭起來。

聽到哭聲,上帝出現了。

上帝問:“我親愛的孩子,你為什麼哭泣啊?”

女裁縫告訴上帝事情說她這枚頂針是她維持許多年重要的物品

...


6 評論, 67 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,2.78 分數
rm_sky570404 25 男性
17  文章
   2011-06-16

我是一個需求很大的人!!!! 有時候幾乎每天都會自己來 雖然有女朋友但是她無法滿足我的需求 因此我們吵了好多次的架,希望在這裡可以找到能滿足我大大需求的姐姐。 弟弟我最喜歡 女生幫我用嘴幫 那種感覺很棒!!!


1 評論, 28 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,2.51 分數
女人差別   2010-07-21

意大利女人和猶太女人的差別何在?”

“意大利女人會叫丈夫去買偉哥,

猶太女人叫丈夫去買 '那間生產偉哥的公司'。”


1 評論, 158 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,3.17 分數
寡婦   2010-04-25

有一個寡婦守寡已久,難耐寂寞蜼蜪蜙蝀,因此她決定結婚,於是她提出徵婚條件? 1.不可以打她 2.不可以離開她 3.要很會幹那檔事  隔日,有個沒手沒腳的男人來找她,寡婦問他符合什麼條件? 他說:「你看,我沒手不能打你,我沒腳不能離開你,至於那檔事嗎......你想想我剛剛是用什麼敲門的」


2 評論, 196 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.14 分數
要去了   2010-04-23

小明上學,老師發現他臉上腫了一大塊,就問他說: 【小明你是怎麼啦?】 小明回答說:【昨天我不敢一個人睡,就跑去跟爸媽一起睡,睡了一會兒,爸爸就問我睡著了沒,我說還沒。】 過了一陣子,爸爸又問我睡著了沒,我又說還沒。 結果爸爸就很生氣的往我臉上打了一拳說: ...


3 評論, 153 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,3.48 分數
荒島流浪記   2010-04-23

有一艘游輪沉沒了, 一男人流落荒島......

過了一個月, 那個男的慾求不滿,就想要找那一隻母豬發洩綰綷緎維,銎銙銛銘不過每次他一靠近那隻母豬都會被公吠,無奈的他只好作罷。。。

又過了幾個月,又有一艘游輪沉沒,這次有一個女人漂到島上。。。

...


2 評論, 108 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,4.12 分數
不能射進裡面   2010-04-23

我是一位大三的學生, 因為要做畢業論文的關係, 目前教授旗下ㄧ位小姐跟四位男公關(ㄧ位學姊跟三位學長跟我). 由於老闆是專研有關"類神經網路" 這是一門的相當費精神而且需要高度邏輯的思考力, 只見研究室終日燈火通明 歌舞昇平(音樂開超大聲) 為了畢業大家都拼了, ...


2 評論, 256 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,3.17 分數
女用自慰棒(轉)   2010-04-23

從前從前有一對年輕夫婦~~~他們的性慾很強~~新婚的時後就做了二十幾次~~~從晚上~~到早上~~~一定都聽得到這總叫聲~~~老~~~老~~老~~老公~~~也幾乎是天天都來~~~這樣~~時光飛逝~~~一過就二十年了~~~~ ...


5 評論, 230 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,3.37 分數
強姦女人的整套工具   2010-04-23

ㄧ天一位美少婦和老公去公園玩。

少婦的老公在湖邊釣魚少婦在樹下看書。

釣了一個多小時她老公屎急上廁所去了。

這時來了一個管理員。

管理員指著湖邊有釣魚桿,對少婦說:「這

裡不許釣魚難道不知道嗎?我要沒收你所有的

釣魚工具。」

...


0 評論, 234 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.47 分數
面具後面的自己   2010-04-16





有時好像身不由己

總是背負著一只面具

或許很多

會到避風港面對真實的自己





認識他嗎


0 評論, 67 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
大方的真相   2010-04-14

一天,阿榮上台北辦事,晚上就到一家旅館投宿。 阿榮就叫旅館媽媽桑來說:媽媽桑借問一下,妳這有沒有小姐阿? 媽媽桑就連忙說有啊有啊,於是她就把旗下所有小姐叫進來讓阿榮挑, 阿榮看了看就挑其中一個陪宿。

晚上就跟他嘿咻嘿咻後問他要多少錢一晚,小姐說1晚3千元阿, ...



0 評論, 161 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,3.85 分數
一男網友氣死一女網友 !!   2010-04-13

男:聊嗎?     女:不   男:為什麼?    女:忙   男:忙什麼?    女:玩   男:玩什麼?    女:遊戲   男:什麼遊戲?   女:好玩的   男:什麼好玩的?  女:煩   男:煩就跟我聊?  女:滾   男:地不乾淨!   女:靠   ...


3 評論, 201 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,3.01 分數
老婆、二奶、女友與酒女的現代語言   2010-04-13

老婆是作業系統,一旦安裝要刪除十分麻煩; 二奶是網路,風光無限,花錢不斷; 女友是桌布,只要你有興趣,天天可以更換; 酒女是盜版軟體,要用之前,記得先掃毒。

老婆是字畫,掛到發黃也不能換; 二奶是年曆,每年都要換新的; 女友是月曆,三十天的時間夠長了; ...


0 評論, 97 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,3.25 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
御醫的報復   2010-04-05

在古代英國,大法官非常仰慕王后美麗迷人的胸部,但他知道猥褻王后的代價是死亡。

他把自己的秘密告訴了亞瑟王的御醫。 御醫答應幫他實現他的願望,大法官答應付給御醫一千金幣作為代價。 於是,御醫配製了一種癢癢水。

...



2 評論, 97 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,4.50 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
媽媽的喜好   2010-04-05

三個離家闖天下成功的聚在一起,討論各自送給老媽的禮物。

大說:『我為媽媽蓋了一棟大房子。』

二說:『我送給她一輛賓士,還附司機。』

...



1 評論, 107 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,4.41 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
你太太比較好   2010-03-28

阿諾和阿比兩個好友, 趁出差投宿旅社, 打電話叫來一個女孩...

十分鐘後, 那女孩走進來, 他們輪流與她進房玩樂...

第二天, 阿諾感慨地說:「唉!她還不錯啦!可是我覺得還是和我太太比較來勁。」



這時候, 阿比也說:「對呀!我也同意, 還是你太太比較好...」
...


1 評論, 159 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,3.92 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
吝嗇到死   2010-03-19

某男人很有錢,但也很吝嗇。

有一次,他患了重病,醫生開藥說要用人參,

他說:「我買不起人參,聽天由命好了。」

醫生改口說:「那用熟地也可以。」 他還是搖頭:「熟地也很貴,買不起,我死了罷。」

...



0 評論, 75 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,4.02 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
那晚強姦了老婆後才知道   2010-03-19

最近這幾月,性生活有點苦悶,每次和老婆做愛都有如做作業,於是我想到一個很刺激的方法。

晚上十點,我打電話回家。

「老婆,你先睡吧,不用等我了,我晚一點才回去。」

「別太晚,別喝太多酒。」

「收到,老婆大人。」

...



2 評論, 220 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,4.77 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
時辰到了   2010-03-19

有位富翁請了一位新司機。

有一天,富翁參加了一個宴會,富翁將司機介紹給大家認識,要司機向大家敬酒,司機從小沒讀多少書,苦思了一會兒,

很高興的舉杯敬大家:「來來來,我們大家同歸於盡吧!(乎乾啦)」

...



0 評論, 73 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,5.20 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
誰的丈夫最了不起   2010-03-11

三個女人甲乙丙在爭論誰的丈夫最了不起…

甲:「我老公好愛我,上個月買了一艘遊艇給我,上面還可以招待一百個朋友。」

乙:「我老公上個月一高興就買了一架飛機給我,讓我可以環遊世界。」

...



2 評論, 131 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,3.92 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
吻仔魚五部曲   2010-03-07

首部曲 老公為了替破病中的老婆煮飯,決定到傳統市場買材料準備煮海鮮粥「孝敬」老婆……

老公:「老闆,今天有進新的魚獲嗎?」

魚販:「有啊!你看鱈魚怎樣?」

老公:「鱈魚…?可是我要煮粥哩!有沒有小魚?」

...


2 評論, 50 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,3.81 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
吻仔魚三部曲   2010-03-07

三部曲為慶祝親愛的老婆小病初癒,這對夫婦決定再到市場去買些魚回來吃吃……

老闆:「今天有新鮮的魚嗎?」

魚販(哇!怎麼又素他們!):「喔,有有有!今天又有剛捕的吻仔魚-鮮的喔 !」「更多條『整尾』煮來吃 ,味道更鮮美喔~!」

...



1 評論, 31 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,3.81 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
吻仔魚二部曲   2010-03-04

二部曲老公辛苦了半天,還是沒弄出一頓像樣的海鮮粥,第二天老婆索性自己到市場買來煮…

老婆:「老闆,今天有比較新鮮的魚嗎?」

魚販想起昨日的經驗便說道:「有有有!才上岸的吻仔魚,粉鮮喔-而且,『整尾』煮來吃,味道更棒!」

...



0 評論, 17 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
吻仔魚首部曲   2010-03-04

首部曲老公為了替破病中的老婆煮飯,決定到傳統市場買材料準備煮海鮮粥「孝敬」老婆……

老公:「老闆,今天有進新的魚獲嗎?」

魚販:「有啊!你看鱈魚怎樣?」

老公:「鱈魚…?可是我要煮粥哩!有沒有小魚?」

魚販:「煮粥呀-那吻仔魚最好了!」 ...



0 評論, 20 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
台灣新三寶   2010-02-28

宅男有三寶:科技、女優、人真好



型男有三寶:親親、抱抱、再推倒



周董有三寶:唉呦、不錯、這個屌



韓劇有三寶:車禍、癌症、醫不好



威武有三寶:蜆精、大鵰、愛福好



謊言有三寶:天長、地久、愛到老



...



1 評論, 72 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,5.20 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
肇事者的自白   2009-11-08

阿德回到停車場之後赫然發現,他的高級轎車的頭燈被人撞壞了,而且還有嚴重的刮傷,

想必肇事的車輛已經跑了,但還好他發現雨刷下壓著一張紙條,

他趕緊看看紙條上的訊息,或許不小心犯錯的人留下了聯繫方式。

紙條上寫著: ...



2 評論, 90 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.14 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
史上最短但最精彩的武俠小說徵文   2009-10-18

一則徵文,徵求史上最短但最精彩的武俠小說。該則徵文要求:

1、要同時涉及三大門派。

2、要包含江湖門派間多年恩怨情仇,又要打破世俗倫理。

3、同時情節還要扣人心弦,大有血雨腥風呼之欲來之勢。令人極為期待該小說之續集,同時留下N多懸念。

...



2 評論, 72 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,5.20 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
俄式自由   2009-09-28

一個美國人和一個俄國人正在辯論自己國家的自由

美國人說: 在美國, 我們有完全的自由, 任何人都可走上白宮臺階, 大罵總統 !

俄國人說: 在俄國也有同樣的自由, 任何人皆可上克里姆林宮的臺階, 大罵美國總統!!
...


0 評論, 45 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
一步錯步步錯 One step wrong step by step wrong   2009-08-20

有個老女人養了一隻公貓很久,有一天她遇到一個許願神...

許願神:「嗨!妳平日心地善良,我現在要送妳兩個願望。」

老女人:「好!我第一個願望是,我要擁有很多錢。」

許願神:「沒問題!妳現在是全世界最富有的人!那妳第二個願望呢?」

...



0 評論, 83 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,4.80 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
實在太噁心   2009-08-18

一艘船失事後,1名女乘客和10名男乘客漂到了一個荒島上。

一個月後,那個女的自殺了,因為她覺得個一個月發生的事情實在太噁心了。

一個月後,他們決定把她埋了,因為他們覺得這一個月發生的事情實在太噁心了。

...



1 評論, 151 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,2.49 分數
rm_knannan 39 男性
40  文章
男人的命相學   2009-08-08

這是由命相學來看的..........

鼻頭要有肉,鼻頭有肉的男人既有欲也有財,衣食無憂! (我有...)

嘴唇要有肉,厚嘴唇的男人為人厚道,薄嘴唇的男人通常都很薄倖! (我也有...)

...


0 評論, 53 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,5.20 分數
弟弟的三大優點   2009-07-04

男人的小鳥有三大優點:

有紀律,早晨比主人先起床。 有禮貌,見到漂亮的女人就立正。 尊敬老人:見到老婆婆就鞠躬。厲害吧!

不過缺點就是他一興奮就會隨地吐痰。


1 評論, 114 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,2.59 分數
namcoland 51 男性
33  文章
沒穿胸罩***+老公外遇***   2009-01-15

1 ‧ 沒穿胸罩***

甲:「我帶你去一個很多女生都沒有穿胸罩的地方。」 乙:「真的嗎?在哪裡?快帶我去!」 甲:「就在隔壁... ...

.

.

.

.

.

. .的.幼稚園!」

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

...


3 評論, 289 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,3.04 分數
namcoland 51 男性
33  文章
左手的手環 (恐怖鬼故事)   2009-01-06

▼左手的手環

在風雨交加颱風夜裡的某個醫院中… 電擊……注射1cc強心劑……一段時間後,手術台上的病人宣告不治。 當時已接近午夜,焦頭爛額的外科醫師正要從五樓坐電梯回家,正當他走進電梯, 轉身按完電梯按鈕,電梯門要關起來的時候,遠方一個護士急急忙忙的跑了過來, ...


0 評論, 53 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,3.70 分數
rm_jeff19719 46 男性
10  文章
酒肉朋友   2008-11-13

出海兩年多的的船員阿福終於回到家鄉。

但,一回到家的他卻發現多一個嬰兒!

阿福激動的問著妻子:「是誰幹的好事?是不是隔壁的阿呆?」

「不是。」妻子回答。

「是不是我的朋友阿瓜?」

「不是。」妻子又回答。

...


2 評論, 167 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,5.18 分數
rm_jeff19719 46 男性
10  文章
上銀行.....   2008-11-13

有天一位老太太上銀行,總裁問她想要存多少錢?

老太太 就把那袋錢倒在總裁的桌上,說是US$165, 000。 總裁當然很好奇那些錢是怎麼來的,他問老太太:

『女士,我很驚訝妳帶著那麼多的現金,這些錢是怎麼來的?』 老太太說:『我跟人打賭。』 總裁:『打賭,怎麼個賭法?』 ...


6 評論, 165 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,5.14 分數
rm_jeff19719 46 男性
10  文章
觸電   2008-11-13

小明早上到了學校,

老師見他右手斷了,

便問:「才幾天不見,你的手是怎麼了?」

小明說:「唉,還不是因為懶惰...」

老師又問:「為什麼懶手就會斷?」

小明回答:「幾天前,我走啊走的,發現鞋子裡面

有顆一顆小石子....但是我懶得把鞋子脫掉,結果 ...


0 評論, 59 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,1.96 分數
rm_jeff19719 46 男性
10  文章
看A片學成語   2008-10-30

看A片也可以學成語喔!?



前幾日上班時, 一票人趁著休息時間哈口煙順便聊天時, 正當話題轉到A片上時...

突然有位女同事出現補了一句說:「為什麼男生這麼愛看A片??看A片到底有什麼好處??」

這時什麼五花八門的答案都出現了...

「當然是學習了!!」(抄襲就抄襲, ...


0 評論, 122 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.47 分數
rm_jeff19719 46 男性
10  文章
網內互打   2008-10-30

有三個人, 分別來自外商公司, 傳統企業跟台績電 ,

在一次意外事故身亡後 , 通通在陰曹地府碰面排隊.

閻王跟他們說 ,

因為事發突然,

他們都還有一次機會可以打電話回陽間 , 跟親朋好友交代一些後事 .

外商公司的打電話給老婆, 交代清楚自己銀行的存款要如何處置, ...


1 評論, 87 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.86 分數
rm_jeff19719 46 男性
10  文章
精子的30種死法^^   2008-10-23

1.久不出兵,鬱悶死!

2.忽有一天,蓄勢待發,興奮死!

3.千億個兄弟一擁而上,擠死!

4.出來發現是主人自行解決,冤死!

5.被濺到地上,摔死!

6.被噴到牆上,撞死!

7.被衛生紙擦掉,風乾至死!

8.被擦掉後,又扔進垃圾桶,熏死!

...


0 評論, 72 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,5.08 分數
跟雞雞對話 限制級   2008-10-07

之前是我正在看球賽 然後她不知道是無聊還怎樣 她就跳到我腳邊 弄開我內褲 把玩我的雞雞 @@" 是不太清楚她在幹嘛 東摸摸西摸摸的 囧 總之我就繼續看我的球賽 沒理她



結果她突然冒出一句:雞雞先生 你好! 我當時還搞不清楚狀況 我就回她一句:什麼? 結果她仍然是說:雞雞 ...


3 評論, 166 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,2.51 分數
willie6896 33 男性
55  文章
女生對話   2008-10-03

A: 妳上過成功嶺嗎? B: 沒有耶...成功嶺是誰?


1 評論, 133 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,2.52 分數
HouKeith 39 男性
7  文章
晨 . 思   2008-08-01

晨 晨耶 金絲雀兒抑揚婉轉的唱著 金絲雀兒忽上倏下的跳著 雀兒呀雀兒 你好似我親愛的baby妹妹樣 被我關在心中的籠籃 是我心中的囚鳥 雀兒呀雀兒 想飛出我的籠籃嗎? 噢!使不得呀! 外面的世界沒有你的食物 妹妹呀妹妹 想飛出我心中的籠籃嗎? 噢!使不得呀! ...


0 評論, 39 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.94 分數
chiachiachinatwn 36 男性
1  文章
定的內容或某文章可能在其他地方發表過,請   2007-03-08

定的內容或某文章可能在其他地方發表過,請


0 評論, 59 瀏覽次數, 0 票
lusciouslips7369 57 伴侶(男人和女人)
36  文章
Blow Job gone wrong   2021-09-15

As we are laying in bed. Me sucking his cock him slamming the dildo into my pussy. We been at it for 20 plus minutes. I had already came 2 times. He wanted 3. I raised my hips I was getting close he said ya suck it I going to cum. I wrapped my lips around the head and went into suction mode. He was pumping at my mouth when he jerked away and Shot Cum straight ...


1 評論, 28 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
blakelovelyxxx69 40 男性
1  文章
Lol   2021-03-14

<br><br> Ou


0 評論, 5 瀏覽次數, 0 票
kapoorkajal 26 女性
1  文章
Call Girls In Jaipur | High Profile Call Girls in Jaipur   2021-01-30

Dear friends, if you are interested in reading of article then it is a most interesting article which I am going to present and you will read the story of jaipur Call Girl on this page just read an entire summary and also visit the personal website-https://www.pinkcityescort.com/ so that you can read and see images just contact us.I am telling a story related to call girl it is the most ...


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
fugglebuddyMD 59 男性
1  文章
Top Ten Warning Signs that the Profile is a Fake   2020-12-04

One of my "kinks" these days is weeding out the various fake profiles that pop up in AdultFriendFinder now and then. So, from the home office in Ypsilanti, Michigan, here are the Top Ten Warning Signs that the Profile is a Fake <br><br> 10. The writer spels and speaks english goodly . 9. Uses a photo of a woman who should be a model 8. Uses a photo of a woman who actually IS a model ...


2 評論, 45 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,1.47 分數
Illbcnu6996 35 男性
5  文章
Anal   2020-08-14

Care share an anal experiences that have gone bad?


0 評論, 23 瀏覽次數, 0 票
Brownandboard 55 男性
16  文章
?? Why is ??   2020-01-30

If we have 3somes all the times but I can’t at females!?!! Lol


1 評論, 8 瀏覽次數, 0 票
Cutehouguy 43 男性
1  文章
The Sound of Incognito   2020-01-28

Hello incognito, my old friend I've come to do bad things again Stealth mode on while I'm creeping Releasing seeds if you catch my meaning And the visions that are planted in brain Still remain but not in web browser after I close out and delete all history just in case <br><br> In office I wasn't alone Nearly caught me on phone 'Neath desk fingers cramp And I think ...


2 評論, 16 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.47 分數
tripod2014 52 男性
15  文章
It's all about the points....   2020-01-26

It's all about the ....It's all about the ....It's all about the ....It's all about the ....It's all about the ....It's all about the ....


2 評論, 18 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,3.30 分數
TravelingMan_90 34 男性
5  文章
points   2020-01-05

4 the points


1 評論, 9 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.47 分數
goodplay696 36 男性
1  文章
i am not funnin in a relationship   2020-01-03

Just need to get some Points so I am adding something here.


1 評論, 14 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,3.00 分數
Wayneb51823 45 男性
5  文章
Funny   2020-01-03

Funny more points


0 評論, 12 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,3.37 分數
TucsonBoneAlone 57 男性
34  文章
Santa Porn   2019-12-26

"Ahh, now for the real life part, " Santa smiled, as Brenda and Sally repositioned themselves. In real life, when it's not porn for men to jack off to, Lesbian sex is a far more beautiful thing and less of a spectator sport. Sally laid back, and Brenda gently slipped her fingers into Sally, turned her wrist just the way she knew, and started the orgasm inducing fingering that worked ...


0 評論, 32 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,2.31 分數
Coolhungdude 37 男性
4  文章
Ahh youth   2019-12-22

So I like cumming on a womans tits or even her and of course Im more in tune with the idea when the partner in question wants it. Oh but what about a time when you lacked experience and aim...Like hitting a womam right in the eye they they are even near your . IE a shot arced back enough land in her eye when we were laying side by side after lol ahh youth


3 評論, 41 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,4.05 分數
kitttylickr69 56 男性
5  文章
No points!   2019-12-20

is not very funny.


0 評論, 1 瀏覽次數, 0 票
casualguy209 47 男性
8  文章
points   2019-12-17

points


0 評論, 5 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.86 分數
Blowjob hickies   2019-12-15

I'm very partial receiving oral. Sometimes some people get a little carried away and when I get home I notice the head of dick is all bloodshot. I was telling friend about this problem and he started calling them dickies. Does anyone else run into this and what do you call it?


3 評論, 42 瀏覽次數, 27 票 ,3.77 分數
Helalha4fwbnsa 34 男性
4  文章
Himor   2019-12-15

Where’s e him in relationshipscv


0 評論, 4 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,0.92 分數
BiggyBee2019 43 男性
2  文章
How well do you know each other :)   2019-12-13

Son: Dad, I’ve heard that in some parts of the world a man doesn’t know his wife he marries her. <br><br> Father: Son, that’s true everywhere.


5 評論, 40 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,2.99 分數
slidenride069 48 男性
3  文章
bi   2019-11-29

to bi or not to bi , bye


2 評論, 28 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,1.67 分數
gaetan8520 38 男性
1  文章
cock size   2019-10-22

I love in how are bigger than everything i see, Pictures or ca m if you want


0 評論, 2 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,3.70 分數
bigcock6061330 45 男性
6  文章
I love white woman   2019-10-20

I prefer white woman, I love my black woman but I also love white woman because they are more freakier.


8 評論, 83 瀏覽次數, 50 票 ,2.62 分數
Daddi19915076 29 男性
3  文章
Funny   2019-10-10

If its easy take it twice


3 評論, 68 瀏覽次數, 55 票 ,1.86 分數
AngloSwiss_CH 72 男性
2  文章
In the family way   2019-10-04

This is the story of a young lawyer who always spent his summer vacation at the same place by the sea. He always went to the same boarding house because the daughter of the hotel looked good enough to eat. Naturally, as the lawyer was handsome and with the summer heat helping, the two young people quickly went from feelings to actions. The next year, the lawyer found his sweetheart, and was ...


4 評論, 125 瀏覽次數, 55 票 ,3.28 分數
Bigdeemikeh2 36 男性
9  文章
Living by the three F's.   2019-09-29

If it floats, flys or fucks. Rent it don't buy it. Anyone else live by this?


4 評論, 55 瀏覽次數, 45 票 ,2.36 分數
Eatitupnbeatit44 33 男性
10  文章
Try to have fun   2019-09-23

Keep your woman happy n always eat her pussy before you fuck her


6 評論, 92 瀏覽次數, 61 票 ,3.94 分數
Pullmytrigger55 49 男性
12  文章
Free bonus   2019-09-18

I remember AdultFriendFinder use to give u credits or 40 day gold or something


6 評論, 73 瀏覽次數, 55 票 ,2.73 分數
Anal sex   2019-09-18

Is it just me or is anyone else worried about being s#$T on


6 評論, 45 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,2.25 分數
Johnnmn61 25 男性
2  文章
Losing my virginity   2019-09-18

Lost it in a construction site with a girl in the front seat of a backhoe. wild experience. a bit of my cum dripped out her pussy onto the seat so someone is probably wondering how that stain got there


0 評論, 2 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,3.12 分數
Johnnmn61 25 男性
2  文章
Losing my virginity   2019-09-18

Lost it in a construction site with a girl in the front seat of a backhoe. wild experience. a bit of my cum dripped out her pussy onto the seat so someone is probably wondering how that stain got there


0 評論, 4 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,1.73 分數
fft209 38 男性
3  文章
points   2019-09-17

pts


0 評論, 1 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
fft209 38 男性
3  文章
points   2019-09-15

points


1 評論, 4 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,3.81 分數
walterio1251 55 男性
2  文章
que TAN IMPORTANTE ES?   2019-09-01

el humor es una variable influyente en una relacion de pareja?


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
Mugz6988 40 男性
7  文章
fun is good   2019-08-28

Nigel and Stephen, are keen fishermen and wine drinkers; here you can see a photo taken while they are enjoying some night fishing while on holiday, with their wives, in Poitou-Charente, France, last year. <br><br> Slurping a large Bordeaux Supérieur, Nigel announces, 'I think I'm going to divorce my wife, she hasn't spoken to me in eighteen months.' ...


4 評論, 98 瀏覽次數, 57 票 ,2.56 分數
sonrising54 57 男性
9  文章
Blind Date   2019-08-24

I had a blind date once. A friend of mine asked take his g/f's sister. I agreed. So I went her place get her. When she opened the door she was 5ft tall and weighed about 350lbs. I thought okay. So we went a nice restaurant. After sitting down she looked at the menu intently. I thought okay. Then she said can I pick what I want. I said sure. She ordered 3 complete meals. The waiter ...


6 評論, 122 瀏覽次數, 54 票 ,3.35 分數
Kevint2457 29 男性
1  文章
Sense of humor   2019-08-17

relationships where both individuals don’t have a good sense of humor never seem work. Understand you have take you relationship serious but making each other laugh and smile helps build and sustain a good relationship.


4 評論, 43 瀏覽次數, 26 票 ,3.35 分數
MagicalHungDevil 31 男性
2  文章
booty   2019-08-07

o booty how I chase thee I only did this for my points yee I don't want to trespass I just want to fuck that ass good people i love you with that said throu


1 評論, 30 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,2.47 分數
MilfHunter78416 26 男性
2  文章
Passing gas in the bedroom   2019-07-31

If you have a significant other or a friend with benefits would it make you laugh if they were to pass gas while having sex? Some people may find it gross but personally I enjoy the embarrassment/ humor that comes from the unplanned moment. Is it really that bad? It seems natural to me. What do you think?


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
points   2019-06-27

points points points points points points


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
rdhair44 65 男性
98  文章
Peter at the gate.   2019-06-21

comes to gates of Heaven telling Peter about her husband and their yard, Peter tells her you didn't need a man , you needed a bull , you are a milking cow.


3 評論, 67 瀏覽次數, 35 票 ,2.01 分數
points   2019-06-19

Points points points points points


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
Summernites88 43 伴侶(男人和女人)
7  文章
Loosen up   2019-06-10

Getting ready for a meet...loosen up. Remember your here for fun. Although keeping our nerves in check is not easy. So lighten up and have the most fun imaginable.


14 評論, 138 瀏覽次數, 86 票 ,5.03 分數
DiscreetNYC90 34 男性
7  文章
points   2019-06-08

for points please ignore


0 評論, 4 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,3.63 分數
DiscreetNYC90 34 男性
7  文章
points   2019-06-08

for points please ignore


0 評論, 2 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,1.04 分數
dess36 53 男性
180  文章
I like   2019-05-29

I like to do it in public places, but of morbid people ho like to look, to me as you can see in my photos, I love it...


7 評論, 74 瀏覽次數, 22 票 ,1.57 分數
points   2019-05-28

doing for more points points points points


0 評論, 1 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,3.70 分數
Pal4Perks 63 男性
3  文章
Panty hose   2019-05-16

So I ducked this woman I met. See told me discrete, and she really wanted it bad. Great i hit it hard, and fast, done in record time. Then she tell me she was a virgin. I say, if I knew you were a virgin, I would have taken my time with you. She says, if I knew you were going to take your time, I would have taken my panty hose off.


1 評論, 56 瀏覽次數, 36 票 ,2.89 分數
anyone ever...   2019-05-04

slap a girls ass while your 69ing and then get the weird feeling like a you just disturbed a bunch of poop particles that are now falling down onto your face...probably not but I swear i've felt dusting before and it really pulls you out of the moment and makes you hesitant to slap that ass again...


5 評論, 59 瀏覽次數, 42 票 ,0.93 分數
points   2019-04-27

points points points points points


1 評論, 16 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,1.99 分數
points   2019-04-26

doing this for more points


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
BoyFreaky22 29 男性
3  文章
Said "No Thank You"   2019-04-08

One night, drinking at my friends, I decided to invite a girl friend over to partake. As the night went on, and her drooling over me, things started to die down and get quiet. Just as the room got silent, my girl friend leaned over and yelled "LET'S FUCK". Me being shy, politely said "No thank you". The next week, the same girl friend called me up and asked me if I would ...


5 評論, 121 瀏覽次數, 49 票 ,3.57 分數
Fully_Loaded_100 33 男性
6  文章
What's the funniest thing that's happened to you during sex?   2019-04-07

I once broke the bed right before climax.. went right through it!


3 評論, 70 瀏覽次數, 38 票 ,3.24 分數
here for the points   2019-03-20

points points points points points points points


0 評論, 2 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,1.04 分數
Alakabam92 31 男性
9  文章
Points   2019-02-17

Just here for the points


12 評論, 88 瀏覽次數, 57 票 ,4.96 分數
Naughty_HotWife1 34 伴侶(男人和女人)
5  文章
funny   2019-02-13

whats the funniest thing thats happened to you in public?


0 評論, 40 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,1.47 分數
discreet?   2019-02-05

funny when you meet someone, they say discreet, and then get naked? mmmmmm


1 評論, 32 瀏覽次數, 23 票 ,2.31 分數
man4nightfun2 54 男性
4  文章
mothers   2019-01-09

One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. <br><br> The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked ...


6 評論, 130 瀏覽次數, 49 票 ,3.43 分數
man4nightfun2 54 男性
4  文章
mothers   2019-01-09

One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. <br><br> The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked ...


5 評論, 78 瀏覽次數, 37 票 ,2.81 分數
man4nightfun2 54 男性
4  文章
meet you in heaven   2019-01-09

After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling greetings to her — “Hello” “How are you! We’ve been waiting for ...


4 評論, 83 瀏覽次數, 31 票 ,3.53 分數
man4nightfun2 54 男性
4  文章
meet you in heaven   2019-01-09

After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling greetings to her — “Hello” “How are you! We’ve been waiting for ...


1 評論, 45 瀏覽次數, 23 票 ,3.60 分數
6ft3intallBBC 26 男性
4  文章
sex   2019-01-06

https://www.healthywomen.org/content/article/understanding-your-sex-drive-when-one-you-wants-it-more?context=healthcenter/60&context_title=60&context_description=


1 評論, 31 瀏覽次數, 20 票 ,0.70 分數
tess3972 44 女性
3  文章
this story to make you laugh   2018-12-29

a lady goes to a restaurant , the waiter comes , and says , can I offer you a beer , she says no no. some wine ? no no , Whisky ?? no no. The waiter says , why ? does it make your legs tremble ? she says , they make me open them


1 評論, 13 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.80 分數
Looking for women that like younger guys   2018-12-04

If you like to chat message on here or six


0 評論, 0 瀏覽次數, 0 票
Looking for women that like younger guys   2018-12-04

If you like to chat message on here or six


0 評論, 1 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,3.70 分數
MrInkyArms 48 男性
2  文章
In a perfect world   2018-11-27

Orgies!


3 評論, 45 瀏覽次數, 34 票 ,2.07 分數
fun4we2or3 48 男性
8  文章
the funniest thing you ever had happen while playing with a partner   2018-11-21

I would be interested in hearing from others as to the funniest thing that has ever happened ..... in the moment..


6 評論, 82 瀏覽次數, 36 票 ,3.76 分數
trellos4u2 37 男性
9  文章
wtf   2018-10-05

for fun or not


4 評論, 60 瀏覽次數, 44 票 ,3.46 分數
Wb219512 34 男性
4  文章
Joke about each other   2018-08-25

I like to joke about each other and call each other names but be very respectful and also know your limit


3 評論, 27 瀏覽次數, 16 票 ,4.16 分數
shaggy19563 67 男性
1  文章
WOW won't believe this.   2018-07-12

Well I was married to a redheaded German, Irish, Indian gal for over ten years. If I could write a book about those years not sure how to put the book on the stands. Fact, fiction, or your not going to believe this shit. The sex life I really miss but if your old enough to remember the 16 ounce Pepsi glass bottles that came in 8 packs I think she could hit a fly off a fence post at about 50 yards ...


3 評論, 107 瀏覽次數, 58 票 ,3.04 分數
UncutLVRJulio 32 男性
5  文章
Relationship Clichés: What They Really Mean   2018-07-05

Regardless of who you date, no matter how long the relationship lasts; chances are you’ll hear some (if not all) of these favorites. Here’s what they really mean. <br><br> “Sometimes the person you want the most is the person you are best without.” I like you but we DO NOT get along. <br><br> “Everything is going to be OK. Maybe not now or ...


13 評論, 196 瀏覽次數, 96 票 ,5.15 分數
I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man looking for a real friend if u like call   2018-05-04

I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man looking for a real friend if u like call me 9734 eight 52353I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man looking for a real friend if u like call me 9734 eight 52353I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man looking for a real friend if u like call me 9734 eight 52353I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata ...


0 評論, 51 瀏覽次數, 41 票 ,1.28 分數
tallman60314 41 男性
16  文章
Finishing First   2018-05-02

Who thinks that laughing should be part of sex? If you finish first, why not clap your hands, cheer and say first ! There is always room and time for a second round!


8 評論, 64 瀏覽次數, 38 票 ,3.65 分數
seriously ,that is considered bisexual ? I am wondering.   2018-04-18

Bisexual seems like a simple term that is easy to understand. But , is it really that simple to declare some a bisexual? Does having participated in a 3 way with another of the same sex make some a bisexual? Does intimate contact with the same sex define the sexuality , or is it the intent of the parties involved. I get a lot of men that want to give oral sex, but If I accept , am I now a ...


9 評論, 126 瀏覽次數, 43 票 ,4.22 分數
flicker3210 35 男性
4  文章
Chewing (Dick) Gum   2018-04-11

I was very young at that time, still in my teens. I was dating a girl and we agreed to a blowjob before moving onto actual sex. She was giving me a nice head and I was enjoying thoroughly as this was the first time I was receiving . She, at the same time was chewing a gum. When she took out my dick from her mouth there was this white substance on its head. She was feeling apologetic that she had ...


4 評論, 110 瀏覽次數, 52 票 ,3.35 分數
Hangry33 51 男性
2  文章
How many dick pics should i post   2018-03-14

What is the ratio regular pics to dic picks that I should have ... like 3 regular pics to 1 dic pic or 3 dic pics to one regular pic <br><br> Also should I use my own dic ? Or a random dic on the internet ? Or a celebrity dic ? <br><br> Just trying to get it right !


6 評論, 65 瀏覽次數, 37 票 ,3.66 分數
funny   2018-03-13

According to new research, humor and laughter may be the most effective way for men and women to initiate and develop a relationship. Jeffrey Hall, an associate professor at the University of Kansas, found that when two strangers meet, the more times a man tries to be funny and the more a woman laughs at those attempts, the more likely it is for the woman to be interested in dating. Chances of ...


2 評論, 14 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,2.42 分數
SparePrickBH 61 男性
7  文章
My friend's antics with crab potion   2018-02-03

This is an old tale but still makes me laugh when I'm reminded of it. <br><br> We were in our 20's and enjoying life as young lads do, including one drunken weekend of partying which included sharing a girl who kindly thanked us with a dose of crabs. <br><br> Apparently, he knew his previous landlady had a bottle of the cure and I drove him over to collect it. ...


4 評論, 102 瀏覽次數, 49 票 ,4.11 分數
funcpl4fwb 58 伴侶(男人和女人)
1  文章
Read the label, its on there for a reason   2018-01-25

We see a couple that we met here on AdultFriendFinder, they are great people, are a lot of fun and awesome friends who we have come to love, trust and respect. Last month we were together for yet another great evening of dinning, conversation and awesome adult fun. Of course, both of the ladies shave down under. I (male) did not shave down under, I never have! We were surprised to see our male friend of this ...


0 評論, 41 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,4.58 分數
Does humor has priority for you in a relationship ?   2017-11-17

Does humor has priority for you in a relationship ?


5 評論, 52 瀏覽次數, 36 票 ,5.31 分數
Luv2eatpuccy 34 男性
13  文章
Whipped   2017-11-14

Ladies if its you husband or boyfriends or nsa friends birthday would you ever put whipped cream on your pussy and tits as a gift for that man in your life and let he lick it all away?


11 評論, 86 瀏覽次數, 43 票 ,6.41 分數
Luv2eatpuccy 34 男性
13  文章
Whipped   2017-11-14

Ladies if its you husband or boyfriends or nsa friends birthday would you ever put whipped cream on your pussy and tits as a gift for that man in your life and let he lick it all away?


3 評論, 31 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,2.82 分數
Me enamora ...   2017-10-26

Me enamora la gente que dice lo que piensa y que realmente piensa lo que dice <br><br> . Que no es fácil. La que defiende sus ideas y sus emociones, porque son suyas y sinceras. <br><br> Pero sin imponerlas a los demás, sin juzgar a quien piensa diferente <br><br> y sin compararse con quien no las comparte.


3 評論, 21 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,2.99 分數
slicmike 31 男性
1  文章
AWKWARD SITUATION   2017-09-19

I was with my chick at a bar when we met up with her ex husband's friend with his chick. I said hello to him and he said, 'Hey, ya gotta big dick?" I laughed at first and sat down. <br><br> He was one of those egotistical dudes that think there on top of the world because he has tattoos, motorcycle, and a good paying job. He looked like Ray Liotta from ...


4 評論, 117 瀏覽次數, 26 票 ,3.67 分數
Go Figure!   2017-09-14

I had a crush on my friends sister but it seemed like every time she was dating someone then I was not and when I was she was not. I really wanted to be with her but over time she got married to a total jerk. She was married before to a jerk so I guess she is attracted to jerks. Maybe that is why we never dated - just saying lol.


7 評論, 42 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,4.44 分數
jr42468 56 男性
24  文章
you have to be funny   2017-09-13

i think that all relationships have to have a good sense of humor it lightens the mood sometimes when tensions are high


3 評論, 37 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,3.97 分數
Enginary 33 男性
39  文章
fun   2017-08-23

enjoy babes!!


0 評論, 14 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,3.51 分數
stevong 41 男性
3  文章
Wolf of Pig   2017-08-20

[image1] The Three Little Pigs Once upon a time there were three little pigs. When they grew up, they left their parents to live their first winter by themselves. Autumn came and it began raining. The three little pigs started to feel they needed a real house to live in. They talked about how to build a house and prepare for the coming winter, but each decided ...


2 評論, 73 瀏覽次數, 20 票 ,4.02 分數
freedom   2017-08-14

commitment = loss of freedom lol!!!


0 評論, 22 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,5.44 分數
caught   2017-07-09

getting caught by your gf while wanking is total fun lol


1 評論, 26 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,3.94 分數
freedom   2017-07-04

freedom compromises after commitment


0 評論, 8 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.08 分數
chickenhawk175 55 男性
2  文章
When a girl says ...   2017-05-27

When a Woman says, "OK, have fun."

Do not have fun. Abort the mission. I repeat. Abort the mission.


1 評論, 49 瀏覽次數, 20 票 ,4.40 分數
Porn Is a Crucial Part of My Relationship   2017-05-20

I love porn. I'm not embarrassed to say it. I'm not picky about where I watch it. Sometimes I watch it in bed while my boyfriend's at home. Other times I watch it on our couch when I need a break from my three jobs and he is still at work. And my taste runs the gamut, though I tend to veer towards watching public sex and threesomes.

Oh, and maybe you caught this: I have a boyfriend. ...


1 評論, 69 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,4.12 分數
People who do not understand other people   2017-04-30

So I work with this guy who decided the best way for him to find the girl of his dreams is to try to meet someone, from another country, online. He had a picture of this girl he was talking to and was so happy... Only problem was when he showed me it was a picture of a pornstar. Aside from this she also claimed to be in South Africa, yeah that country known for being terrible, and needed money ...


3 評論, 58 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,2.84 分數
Magdalena69n 40 女性
1  文章
Love Line   2017-04-02

Love line with Adam needs to come back so bad...guys you need to listen.


8 評論, 74 瀏覽次數, 42 票 ,2.62 分數
Married or Single   2017-03-25

I was wondering what type of situation most women prefer here. When one is involved, do you prefer to find someone else who is also in a relationship or is preferable to find a single man. What do the single women here prefer. I like a drama free situation with someone fun and outgoing, but I am single and keep my options open.


5 評論, 57 瀏覽次數, 22 票 ,4.57 分數
nightflyer99 49 男性
6  文章
oldie but goodie   2017-02-15

One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger. A few seconds later, a Genie popped out of the lamp, An angry Genie, because the man had kicked his lamp.

Reluctantly, the genie said, "Even though you kicked me, I shall still give you three wishes as your reward for releasing me. However, because of what you did, I ...


4 評論, 106 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,3.65 分數
Opps have you been recognized by, friends, coworkers, family?   2017-02-02

So has it happened to you any thing bad come of it? Anything good come of it?

Or just embarrassed....

I was recognized in my blk dress this week! opps family..., mmmmm coworker!


20 評論, 299 瀏覽次數, 59 票 ,6.06 分數
autopalm77 51 男性
7  文章
Haaaaachu....!!!!   2016-11-17

A woman constantly keeps sneezing and goes to see the doctor. She tells him, "Doctor, I constantly keep sneezing, and every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm." The doctor asks, "What are you doing for it?" The woman replies, "Sniffing pepper."


5 評論, 90 瀏覽次數, 28 票 ,4.78 分數
MsCarlalee 61 跨性別
9  文章
who can you trust   2016-11-08

Two couples were playing cards. Jeff accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed that Dave's wife, Sandy, was not wearing any underwear! Shocked by this, Jeff hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced.

Later when Jeff went to the kitchen to get some refreshments Sandy followed him and asked, "Did you see anything under ...


6 評論, 276 瀏覽次數, 26 票 ,5.94 分數
rm_BIGYODAG2 65 男性
24  文章
Drunk   2016-09-30

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to the counter, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your mom's the best sex in town! Great Pussy!"

Everyone expects a fight, but the younger dude ignores him, so the drunk wanders off and bellies up to the bar at the far end.

Ten minutes later, the old drunk comes back, points at the same guy, and ...


3 評論, 131 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,4.10 分數
Weekend sex   2016-09-30

Would love to have sex- i said.

She gave me a glove...

Xxx


6 評論, 57 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,3.78 分數
BBCheadlover 53 男性
2  文章
false advertisment   2016-09-21

so awhile back i met a lady on AdultFriendFinder and what caught my attention was that she said she loved to work out, but more importantly (at least for me lol) she loved giving head. so after a few weeks of getting to know each other, we were chatting one friday night. she had a date that was running late or maybe just blowing her off. i was home bored and jokely said if you need some replacement dick, i'm ...


3 評論, 228 瀏覽次數, 21 票 ,4.12 分數
funcrux 46 男性
7  文章
Human Relationships   2016-09-20

Ultimately, the only way to make good friends is to become a good friend yourself. Good people gather around other good people.


2 評論, 15 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,3.43 分數
Arnetorp 73 男性
9  文章
I am ready   2016-09-08

Was told that the other night- was excited. But the only thing i was ready for- was to sleep... Age...


6 評論, 45 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,3.28 分數
nicelifej 33 男性
3  文章
.zdfgjkldfklhb   2016-09-04

respect is the most important value in the relationship


1 評論, 15 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,3.08 分數
luv2liku698 60 男性
1  文章
Tires made of pussy   2016-08-21

We were having a discussion at the bar one afternoon. This girl said, "If tires were made of pussy they would never wear out!". I told her that it wouldn't work. The whole world would then smell like fish!!


3 評論, 56 瀏覽次數, 16 票 ,3.27 分數
BrightBlueEyes80 35 男性
5  文章
Why do people always say things that arent?   2016-08-02

Why do girls always say they dont want anything serious, then all of a sudden they want something serious? Why not just be straight up?


4 評論, 37 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,4.10 分數
Alessandro46975 61 男性
2  文章
paying for services   2016-07-21

When is cheating on your partener, if you go get a massage with a happy ending is that cheating, if you pay for a service is that cheating, women are offering all kinds of services to men.

It does not mean you don't love your girl or wife!!


2 評論, 32 瀏覽次數, 13 票 ,1.80 分數
wittyhumor 41 男性
37  文章
The Fickle Times We Live In.....   2016-04-15

"Nevermind what's being said to you! Then maybe you could learn to fuck better!"

That's what I said to her as I came in her mouth after, a less than par blowjob.....

"Didn't you learn anything from those porn flicks that you keep in your closet?!!"

I had asked her that before, and she hates it every time. She then says to me, that, she thought I loved her, and she ...


1 評論, 96 瀏覽次數, 13 票 ,0.46 分數
wittyhumor 41 男性
37  文章
The case of my missing twix bars....   2016-04-15

The first time in total, and in my hands I left a little bit of a mess.....

It was just then, when, she was going through my emails that i have sent here and there.....

So, I said to her that it was just all in good fun, and yes I do online sex often....

She's so cute, and sweet, as well as, A's on my report card....

Yeah, it was not able to make a difference ...


0 評論, 53 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,2.36 分數
UZIoSUICIDE 50 男性
27  文章
Lessor of two evils   2016-03-11

"So let me get this straight, " the prosecutor says to the defendant, "you came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man." "That's correct, " says the defendant. "At which time, " continues the prosecutor, "you take out a pistol and shoot your wife, killing her." "That's correct, " says the defendant. "Then my question to you is, why did you shoot your wife and the man ...


0 評論, 229 瀏覽次數, 24 票 ,4.95 分數
UZIoSUICIDE 50 男性
27  文章
Make her scream...   2016-03-11

Hey guys... I figured out how you can make your girlfriend or wife or whatever scream during sex.. It's super easy and it works every time... All ya gotta do.. While you are having sex take your phone... and call your girl and tell her about it...


5 評論, 112 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,4.68 分數
UZIoSUICIDE 50 男性
27  文章
WINNER WINNER WINNER   2016-03-11

So, a man asks his wife "If I won the lottery, what would you do?" His wife says, "Take half and leave you" The man smiles and says, "Good cuz I won 12 bux from the lottery today, heres 6 now get out"


0 評論, 50 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,4.66 分數
sexxxcrzd 37 伴侶(男人和女人)
9  文章
Look how sexy my wife is...   2016-02-06

...That is all.

-Sexxxcrzd(m)


14 評論, 174 瀏覽次數, 26 票 ,5.61 分數
wickedcat2006 49 女性
145  文章
the vagina!!!   2016-01-31

The best engine in the world is the Vagina. It can be started with one finger, It is self lubricating, It takes any size piston, And it changes it's own oil every four weeks. It is only a pity that the management system is so fucking temperamental.....


4 評論, 120 瀏覽次數, 41 票 ,7.16 分數
rm_Nikkicandie1 26 伴侶(男人和女人)
0  文章
its funny now not s much then   2015-12-06

nikki an myself was in bed and she says she has to pee.okay I thought get up and go like any sane person would do.well she for some reason got the idea to act like she was a dog and omg she pissed on me!!and I don't mean just a lil I mean straight full blast peed lol then says she was marking what belongs to her lol I couldn't be mad after that bc it was so funny and sweet at the same time yet ...


4 評論, 98 瀏覽次數, 21 票 ,2.14 分數
mrryan74 47 男性
5  文章
wife joke   2015-10-30

A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her that it's still experimental. He tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner, so that night, she does just that. About a week later, she’s back at the doctor, where she says, "Doc, the pill worked great! I put it in the potatoes like you said! It wasn't ...


15 評論, 453 瀏覽次數, 41 票 ,6.76 分數
mrryan74 47 男性
5  文章
BBQ time   2015-10-30

A husband exclaims to his wife one day, "Your butt is getting really big. It's bigger than the BBQ grill!" Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"


5 評論, 225 瀏覽次數, 22 票 ,5.77 分數
rm_NOPoet30 67 男性
47  文章
Always use condoms?   2015-10-29

Many will say YES! Let me state my case: 1st I was with the same partner for over 20 yr.s before she passed away. Last full physical showed No STDs & a sperm count so low, as to not exist. 2nd I have a reaction to latex [Rash] & little or no sensation. So, I ask if she can prove she is disease free - which I feel is being honest- and that for reasons stated I don't use condoms. Mostly, I get ...


1 評論, 88 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,1.86 分數
rm_NOPoet30 67 男性
47  文章
Always use condoms?   2015-10-29

Many will say YES! Let me state my case: 1st I was with the same partner for over 20 yr.s before she passed away. Last full physical showed No STDs & a sperm count so low, as to not exist. 2nd I have a reaction to latex [Rash] & little or no sensation. So, I ask if she can prove she is disease free - which I feel is being honest- and that for reasons stated I don't use condoms. Mostly, I get ...


3 評論, 46 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,4.12 分數
rm_BIGYODAG2 65 男性
24  文章
ANOTHER POEM FOR THE MAG -= SAD, FUNNY & LAME   2015-08-22

LAMO

We met in a chat room General conversation Things get hot & heavy She is coming over for sex. ‘Can’t see you till after work Be there by 8 AM my dear.’

She had sent a photo From the neck to her waist To whet my appetite I guess She was lovely, bare big breasted.

Troubled sleep – toss & turn Big Yoda is throbbing My mind is in a whirl Putting a face & name ...


2 評論, 76 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,3.25 分數
Satyr48 75 男性
8  文章
Karma   2015-08-20

Two former female neighbors met in the Afterlife, after both suffering untimely deaths. Being surprised to see each other, they asked how they me their fates. One woman said she froze to death. "Oh, my goodness!" the other replied, "that's terrible" "Well; not SO bad" the other replied, "After a while the cold went away, and I drifted off into a warm sleep" The second woman said she died of a ...


3 評論, 236 瀏覽次數, 26 票 ,5.40 分數
wittyhumor 41 男性
37  文章
I Forget Stuff Sometimes   2015-08-15

I looked up at my ceiling the other day and as I was laying there I saw what I thought to be a sliver of paint on it. I didn't pay it any attention but I noticed that it had some limbs. So obviously it's a bug. I grab the bug spray and down it goes. I quickly picked it up off the floor and flush it in the toilet. Moments later i get a knock at the door. So I quickly answer the door as I am ...


0 評論, 220 瀏覽次數, 13 票 ,2.64 分數
MsCarlalee 61 跨性別
9  文章
The Successful Son   2015-08-03

Four men went golfing one day. Three of them went to the 1st tee while the other went to to the club house to pay the bill. The three men started bragging on their sons. The first man said "My son is a successful home builder. He's so successful that he gave a friend a new home for free. The second man said "My son is such a good car salesman that he know owns a multi-line dealership. And ...


4 評論, 229 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,5.67 分數
Otis_Good 71 男性
18  文章
Listen up   2015-07-15

I was talking to my ex one day after sex and asked who is the best lover you ever had ? I was feeling pretty sure she was going to say me after the fancy fuck I just gave her but no . Yap yap yap she went on and on . I kind of stoped listening until I heard . And in the shower Rose said you might as well wash my back and ass a deal is a deal . What ? What deal ? I asked . Rose my second roommate ...


2 評論, 304 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,2.52 分數
wickedcat2006 49 女性
145  文章
gossipers!!!   2015-06-15

Mildred, the church gossiper and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several members did not approve of her extra curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused a new member, Henry, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of ...


3 評論, 244 瀏覽次數, 39 票 ,6.82 分數
Badazzboy4U 33 男性
3  文章
Fucked up families   2015-06-04

There's a story in one of the Charles Town, Wes Virginiay news about a brother and sister who went to their sons High School graduation because all three graduated on the same day in 2008. The really weird thing is that he has several profiles on this and other sites and uses a photo of him with his sister taken at the Graduation Party in 2008. Now that is really fucked up!!!



...


0 評論, 64 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,3.55 分數
suryareddy004 20 男性
1  文章
my first romance   2015-05-28

haii friends, this is my real experience in my life.once my Aunty's daughter came to my house for spend her holidays.she was very beautiful and sexy.I loved her so much.one day night do small fighting between she and her mom.then she get nervous feeling. and she come to my bed beside of me.then time is gone.then I put my hand at her PUSSY.then she shifted her face beside of my face, and she give ...


0 評論, 121 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,2.28 分數
1HORNYOLDBUGGER2 54 男性
3  文章
Having sex with The King! Thank you.. Thank you very much...   2015-04-15

I have always found ways to make a girl bust up laughing; while we have sex.. Creative singing is one them.. I have a knack for turning something innocent; into something naughty..... For instance.. I heard an Elvis song while driving to a date. Latter when we were ready for a romp, I sang my dirty version. It went like this: Are you lonesome tonight?... ...


2 評論, 94 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,4.66 分數
dh1313h 35 男性
3  文章
For Fun   2015-03-15

A boss said to his secretary I want to have SEX with you I will make it very fast. I'll throw $1000 on the floor, by the time you bend down to pick it I'll be done. She thought for a moment then called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend then said to her, do it but "Ask him for $2000, pick up the money very fast he wouldn't even have enough time to undressed himself." So she ...


3 評論, 244 瀏覽次數, 20 票 ,4.53 分數
Kycre8iveman 71 男性
0  文章
My Date From Hell!   2015-02-18

Written by: KyCre8iveGuy

NOW THE STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ, MAY SEEM TOTALLY WEIRD AND COMPLETELY CRAZY…BUT HAND OVER MY HEART…IT’S THE COMPLETE TRUTH!!

I met a young lady on a Transgendered website. She was 35-years-old, had long blonde, beautiful hair and the face and body of a Goddess. We chatted for a while on the website and through personal emails. Eventually, we ...


6 評論, 297 瀏覽次數, 39 票 ,4.62 分數
rm_canwechat1 72 男性
1  文章
IRONY   2015-01-13

Isn't it Ironic that this page is blank, can one surmise from that that there is nothing funny about sex? from my experience it can't be so, many a gut splitting laugh has come out of the absurd situation we sometimes find ourselves in in the pursuit of sex.


0 評論, 35 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,3.01 分數
missourimuffdive 63 男性
1  文章
Dead Roses!   2014-11-21

On my fifth wedding anniversary i decided to get my wife a dozen red roses, they looked a little wilted and thought that they just needed some water and some miracle grow for flowers. I bought the roses thinking that i could bring them back to life somehow. When i got home if put them in vase with some water and miracle grow. An hour had passed and they looked a little bit better but still looked ...


2 評論, 91 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,2.49 分數
maximil_power 33 男性
1  文章
A Realization After Sex   2014-11-13

So the encounter began as hot and passionate as ever! She started unbuttoning my shirt, but had to raise her arms so I could throw HER shirt off! She must have thought, forget the buttons, and tried to pull mine over my head too!

We were tearing each other's clothes off like they were on fire!

She went for my belt, I went for her bra, and after struggling like I was trying to ...


3 評論, 231 瀏覽次數, 18 票 ,3.26 分數
rm_goodsxwithu 53 伴侶(男人和女人)
10  文章
Funny   2014-11-12

Have you ever gotten rug burns from having sex on a carpet? There's nothing funny about it the next morning.


18 評論, 133 瀏覽次數, 29 票 ,5.25 分數
kimdan4fun 41 伴侶(男人和女人)
10  文章
Testimonials   2014-11-07

If you get one do you always allow it to show up on your profile or do you sometimes hide them?


5 評論, 67 瀏覽次數, 14 票 ,3.30 分數
prettyinpink838 40 伴侶(男人和女人)
6  文章
Going   2014-10-31

Funny how the longer you know someone the more you get use to seeing them going to the bathroom and how little it matters.


11 評論, 126 瀏覽次數, 24 票 ,6.20 分數
rm_3xthefun99 54 伴侶(男人和女人)
4  文章
Humor   2014-10-21

We think it's really funny how many guys want us to watch them jerk off on cam. Do they really think that's what people on here want to see? Oh and just an added note for those of you that think a woman is watching you on all those couple profiles. It isn't.


9 評論, 90 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,4.44 分數
Funny?   2014-10-15

If you write me and ask to fuck, suck or perform any other sex act with you before we've had a chance to chat first then I'll know you're just being funny.


9 評論, 108 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,6.56 分數
lovestolick619 48 男性
171  文章
Understanding Women   2014-10-01

A Woman's Vocabulary, Keywords and Meanings (as taken from an interview with a woman)

FINE This is the word we use at the end of any argument in which we feel we are right, but need to shut you up. NEVER use 'Fine' to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your ...


3 評論, 56 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,4.07 分數
lovestolick619 48 男性
171  文章
Understanding Men   2014-10-01

"IT'S A GUY THING" Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH, " "SURE, HONEY, " OR "YES, DEAR" Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN" Translated: "I ...


2 評論, 42 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,3.80 分數
lovestolick619 48 男性
171  文章
When Alice Went Deer Hunting   2014-10-01

It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.

Jake asks her: "What are you up to?"

Alice smiles: "I'm going hunting with you!"

Jake, though he had many reservations about ...


2 評論, 200 瀏覽次數, 13 票 ,4.82 分數
Lost_Cause_69 51 男性
6  文章
Hard Liquor...   2014-09-20

Two female co-workers are chatting it up, and they are discussing the boyfriends they’ve had in the last year. One girl says "The last 3 boyfriends I’ve had, I’ve named after soda pops. The first one i called 7up, because he had 7 inches and he knew how to keep it up. The second one i called mountain dew, because when it came to mounting he knew what to do. The third i called Jack Daniels." ...


8 評論, 279 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,6.67 分數
Lost_Cause_69 51 男性
6  文章
Lunch would be ready......   2014-09-15

A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?" Her father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperms and eggs. He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet-dreams...and he thinks, what the hell, and goes on to tell her the works. He covers a ...


2 評論, 247 瀏覽次數, 21 票 ,6.84 分數
Lost_Cause_69 51 男性
6  文章
Three kinds of each...   2014-09-06

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?" The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, her breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions." "Onions?" the son asks. "Yes. You see them and they make you ...


3 評論, 157 瀏覽次數, 20 票 ,4.91 分數
sadako2l 43 女性
4  文章
Lesbian joke #69   2014-09-04

What do you call a can of tuna on a lesbian's coffee table?



Potpourri


2 評論, 88 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,3.26 分數
vazzaam1 37 男性
7  文章
bar joke   2014-07-19

A guy walks into a bar and says to the barman, "Give me six double vodkas."

The barman says, "Wow, you must have had one hell of a day."

"Yeah, I just found out my oldest son is gay."

The next day, the same guy comes into the bar and asks for six double vodkas. When the bartender asks what's wrong, the man says, "I just found out that my youngest son is gay, too!" ...


7 評論, 342 瀏覽次數, 24 票 ,6.65 分數
GGnCerb 51 伴侶(男人和女人)
1  文章
Joke...   2014-06-27

How do you know you just had a good blow job?

- When she gives you a blow job she sucks the sheets up your ass.

Now how do you know the woman that just gave you that blow job is a good girl?

- She pulls the sheets back out for you.


2 評論, 88 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,3.91 分數
tmk345 41 男性
12  文章
SIR   2014-04-30



A


1 評論, 59 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,1.66 分數
thislustfulmind 42 男性
28  文章
Fun Facts about the Great Vagina   2014-04-28

Fun Facts about the Great Vagina


7 評論, 262 瀏覽次數, 26 票 ,7.02 分數
thislustfulmind 42 男性
28  文章
Interesting facts about the Penis   2014-04-28

Interesting facts about the Penis


6 評論, 177 瀏覽次數, 24 票 ,7.33 分數
rm_rituraj510 28 男性
12  文章
Getting rid of Ex   2014-04-04

An explorer goes into an undiscovered tomb for the first time, and in the center of the tomb there’s a lamp. He picks it up, and as he starts to rub the dirt off of it, a genie comes out of the lamp and says, “I want to know the person you hate the most.” The explorer says, “That’s gotta be my ex-wife. Why?” “I am a cursed genie. I will grant you three wishes, but whatever you wish ...


3 評論, 284 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,5.39 分數
rm_rituraj510 28 男性
12  文章
how are people born?   2014-04-04

A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was ...


3 評論, 171 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,4.85 分數
Islandman209 47 男性
6  文章
what women would do if they had a penis for a day   2014-03-04

10. Get ahead faster in corporate America.

9. Get a blow job.

8. Find out what is so fascinating about beating the meat.

7. Pee standing up while talking to other men at a urinal.

6. Determine WHY you can't hit the bowl consistently.

5. Find out what it's like to be on the other end of a surging orgasm.

4. Touch yourself in public ...


4 評論, 87 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,5.04 分數
Islandman209 47 男性
6  文章
WHAT MEN WOULD DO IF THEY HAD A VAGINA FOR A DAY   2014-03-04

10. Immediately go shopping for zucchini and cucumbers.

9. Squat over a hand-held mirror for an hour and a half.

8. See if they could finally do the splits.

7. See if it's truly possible to launch a ping pong ball 20 feet.

6. Cross their legs without rearranging their crotch.

5. Get picked up in a bar in less than 10 minutes ... BEFORE closing ...


2 評論, 63 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,4.82 分數
Islandman209 47 男性
6  文章
25 Secrets Girls Have To Know About Guys   2014-03-04

. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.

2. Guys hate flirts.

3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.

4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.

5. "Are you doing something?" or "Have you eaten already?" are the first usual ...


1 評論, 68 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.86 分數
Islandman209 47 男性
6  文章
long distance   2014-02-23

How To Have A Long Distance Relationship VideoJug is here to help if geography is getting in the way of you and your loved one. Follow our guide on how to have a long distance relationship, and keep your relationship alive despite where you are in the world.



Step 1: Talk it through

You need to discuss your expectations of the relationship once you are apart, and set ...


0 評論, 22 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
LIKESTOLICKMOORE 46 男性
23  文章
If You Use Handcuffs, Always Keep a Spare Key Handy   2014-02-01

I've even got a better idea, make sure you have one key on a string, around your wrist before you play, and have a spare on your key ring.

The reason? My two best friends, Ted and Bobbi and I play around quite a bit. Sometimes I go to their house for MFM threesome, sometimes they come over to my house to have a mfmf party with Debbie and me.

And sometimes, Ted and Bobbi just get ...


3 評論, 173 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,4.64 分數
hysteroyster 33 女性
2  文章
Foodie   2014-01-27

Urban Dictionary defines foodie as: a douchebag who likes food; though the terms "gastronome" and "epicure" define the same thing.

I don't remember being an asshole due to my foodism, I have however perceived others as such when my desire for certain foods or eateries were denied.

...which I guess does indeed make me a douchebag.

But who could resist the succulent steak ...


1 評論, 41 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,2.78 分數
annie444u 52 伴侶(男人和女人)
135  文章
What Annie didn't tell you..............   2014-01-23

....was that before she rolled the damn can of Crème of Mushroom soup perfectly under my right foot was:

1. the fact that we have wood floors and they had just been polished.

2. I was wearing socks, not shoes at the time of impact.

3. She had just opened the cupboard above me slamming me in the head with the bottom corner of the oak cabinet

4. That ...


3 評論, 101 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,3.19 分數
annie444u 52 伴侶(男人和女人)
135  文章
Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen Ruin the Meal (er, uh, ruin one's head)   2014-01-23

My husband Danny is an excellent chef. If it can be grilled, he can grille it like no one's ever grilled meat before. If it can be broiled, he can broil it to perfection. He can bake, fry, you name it.

However, sometimes we'll have guests coming over for a big dinner and he needs help in the kitchen....that's where I come in...or at least I used to.

He gave me a list of ...


4 評論, 156 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,4.06 分數
What to do   2014-01-01

What to do


0 評論, 23 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,0.49 分數
What to do   2014-01-01

What to do


0 評論, 12 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,2.42 分數
solidsingh2 29 男性
6  文章
SPECIAL YESTERDAY BUT UNWANTED TODAY   2013-11-30

DO U KNOW WHAT HURTS THE MOST.........?

ITS WHEN SOMEONE MADE U FEEL VERY VERY SPECIAL YESTERDAY....................................................................................................................................................BUT....................................................................................MADE U FEEL THAT U R THE MOST UNWANTED PERSON TODAY.....!! ...


3 評論, 58 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.47 分數
jaipurcouple1979 41 伴侶(男人和女人)
3  文章
Glitter and Sparkles   2013-10-01



I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am. The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any ...



3 評論, 278 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,5.73 分數
jaipurcouple1979 41 伴侶(男人和女人)
3  文章
Glitter and Sparkles   2013-10-01



I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am. The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any ...



3 評論, 100 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,4.80 分數
TomRakewell 31 男性
10  文章
Flakes.   2013-09-18

Tell your funniest flake story!


1 評論, 55 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,1.94 分數
Badtrev 43 男性
9  文章
On being discreet...   2013-09-09

I cannot speak for everyone, but in the case of my wife and I discretion is an absolute non-negotiable must. Her work is sensitive to anything that may be conveyed as "alternative" and my work is very publicly oriented where I talk to hundreds of different people a week. On top of that we're also involved in the community and have a lot of friends who might not be ready to understand. So we ...


2 評論, 162 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,3.21 分數
LTSwing69 51 伴侶(男人和女人)
2  文章
Greener Grass   2013-09-07

Being that my husband was born and raised his whole life here in this small County He is pretty well known and knows most other locals that have been born and raised here. Its safe to say that when we meet new people If its through a mutual friend , they have already been pre warned or pre schooled that we are freaks. They don't know what to expect and though they all at one time or another ...


2 評論, 284 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,3.28 分數
bostonguy27yo 32 男性
1  文章
Ever Fart by accident while getting blowjob?   2013-08-11

haha


2 評論, 64 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,1.37 分數
OneMikeHancho 29 男性
2  文章
Say it isn't so!   2013-07-26

A hysterical woman came into the ER. She'd just had a fight with her boyfriend while sitting in his parked car. She said she had gotten so mad at him that she pulled the key out of the ignition and put it in her vagina so he couldn't drive home! Now she couldn't locate the key to get it out. I couldn't find it either, so we concluded that it must have fallen out ...


4 評論, 364 瀏覽次數, 13 票 ,2.81 分數
OneMikeHancho 29 男性
2  文章
Maybe you?   2013-07-26

"One night, a gurney rolled in carrying a woman in black lingerie-who happened to be straddling a naked man. They told us that they had been doing a lot of drugs and having wild sex when the woman's vagina cramped up and the guy couldn't pull out. The doctor on duty gave her muscle relaxants, and after several minutes, they were able to separate. Then they were promptly ...


4 評論, 323 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,4.58 分數
funny   2013-06-06

tha daughter ask her dad to use tha car he say wat u goin to do for me she says idk wat do u want so he says i want a bj she says thats sick ur my dad he says do u want tha car r not so she starts suckin then she stops and looks at her dad and says dad whys ur dick taste like shit so he says that reminds me ur brothers using tha car


1 評論, 198 瀏覽次數, 9 票
annie444u 52 伴侶(男人和女人)
135  文章
I want to know why the sexually frustrated, sexually depraved women go for my Danny   2013-03-16

Are there any other guys out there that get hit on by divorced, sexually depraved, sexually frustrated women like my Danny does.

I swear the boy must have the record for banging girls that are divorced and who haven't had sex with anyone since they split with their husbands.

Danny can relate story after story to me about how these women, many of them cougars, seduce him and, ...


5 評論, 354 瀏覽次數, 22 票 ,3.49 分數
MeYouandHer692 34 伴侶(男人和女人)
1  文章
Quit smoking   2013-03-15

A very smart doctor once told me that the only way for a man to kill himself slowly over a period of 30-40 years while spending huge amounts of moneey other than smoking was to get married,


2 評論, 175 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,3.48 分數
erfaanbd 42 男性
2  文章
SEXTING   2013-02-11

Text SEX 2win a BABY. 1t per sperm. Offer ends wen some-1 is pregnant. Lucky draw will b held @ d labour ward. promosen starts wen U make love with some-1 & ends wen U ar satisfied, hurry now! limited partners. So get started now!


0 評論, 142 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,1.94 分數
annie444u 52 伴侶(男人和女人)
135  文章
Using One Friend to Make Another Girl Jealous, I Instead Made Them Into Lovers   2013-02-02

Sometimes our best ideas become our worst nightmares.....

Sometimes what seems like a good idea one minute comes back to bite us in the ass the very next second.

By using Diane, my best bi-sexual friend and lover to get Katie jealous, I instead turned them into lovers.

Katie never really left Earl, she remained married to him for years, but Katie made love to Diane ...


3 評論, 269 瀏覽次數, 20 票 ,4.66 分數
lovethey1952 71 男性
2  文章
Fun at the Gentleman’s Club   2012-10-27

Fun at the Gentleman’s Club

I have been on AdultFriendFinder off and on now for several years. I have met some great ladies and continue to be friends. A short time ago, I contacted a lady on AdultFriendFinder and she stated she was a dancer. I chatted with her and finally went to meet her at her club. It was not one of the fancier ones in the area, but reminded me of a club I liked in Pennsylvania. As we chatted ...


3 評論, 368 瀏覽次數, 13 票 ,1.47 分數
indicaking1993 30 男性
3  文章
accidental slip   2012-10-20

alright i very much like the doggy position. as a girl is it a big deal when a guy slips his dick in the asshole instead of the pussy on accident.


0 評論, 19 瀏覽次數, 1 票
xxmtmgxx 36 男性
1  文章
Article Title   2012-09-12

Article Body


0 評論, 4 瀏覽次數, 0 票
Funny only now, many years later   2012-08-11

I'm in college and pick out this good looking freshman during orientation.

That night I'm munching away on a her and suddenly get a string in my mouth.

Yep, you guessed it.

So I stop, grab a quick, long swig from the beer bottle and ask her if she's on the the rag.

Comes out no boyfriend had ever eating her before and she didn't realize there was anything ...


5 評論, 274 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,3.51 分數
c6love 32 男性
26  文章
humor   2012-07-03

so has anyone been farted on during sex. not a sex fart but an actual fart. it has happened to me numerous times. i almost burst out in laughter each time. is this normal for girls to fart during sex


7 評論, 130 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.45 分數
foxeyatfifty 67 女性
26  文章
Lost condom ??   2012-06-12

Would some of you like to share your humorous moments with you lover. I will share on of mine, we had lots of fun and some good sex, we were using a condom of course. After playtime we were looking for the condom to put it in the garbage, well we took apart the bed, looked under the bed, on the floor...could not find it, so we thought we should look and see what had turned out on the ...


6 評論, 457 瀏覽次數, 25 票 ,5.90 分數
nobody328 26 男性
23  文章
IMPORTANT   2012-05-30

HUMOR IN RELATIONSHIP IS IMPORTANT AND ADVISABLE


3 評論, 55 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.08 分數
rcoachv1 47 男性
1  文章
swinger or swingers   2012-03-15

here is some food for thought if you and your partner are active swingers , but this time you do your own thing(have sex with another swinger couple) without your partner. do they have the right to be upset about it


2 評論, 145 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.45 分數
Dirty_Pinguin 32 男性
3  文章
Humor and Attraction : who likes jokers ??   2012-02-24

Have you heard the one about the relationship scientist who walks into a bar with a journal under one arm and a duck under the other? Never mind...it wasn’t very funny to begin with. If that's the only joke you know, will your lackluster sense of humor hurt you when it comes to attracting a romantic partner? It turns out that the use and importance of humor differs between men and women in ...


0 評論, 35 瀏覽次數, 1 票
nvrgetsenuf 50 女性
11  文章
First Date Fuck-Ups, episode 2   2012-02-07

I met Jose (not his real name, to protect the guilty), while I was pumping gas & he was cleaning the canopy over the gas pumps. He would splash a little water to make me think it had started sprinkling. He did this twice before I looked up to see him. He then asked if I would like to go to a movie Friday. He was very good looking so I answered yes. He told me where his second job is, what time he ...


5 評論, 524 瀏覽次數, 24 票 ,4.61 分數
captthickstick 38 男性
1  文章
Singles   2012-02-01

"If you're going to cheat, you shouldn't be in a relationship."

Is it just me, or do you hear single people say this a helluva lot more than those in relationships?


1 評論, 86 瀏覽次數, 2 票
rm_sexspice40 49 女性
6  文章
april fool   2012-01-30

you walk into a room and find your lover and your best friend under the sheets both naked. when they see you, they both scream april fool. you look at the calender and realise its april 1st. what would you do.


9 評論, 371 瀏覽次數, 15 票 ,3.28 分數
_JKH_ 69 男性
858  文章
Ed the Chicken !   2012-01-04

Ed came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.

He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ed.'

Ed was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'

St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a ...


5 評論, 372 瀏覽次數, 16 票 ,3.42 分數
rm_Toyboyj624 26 男性
11  文章
Laughter in bed   2011-11-17

Sex is the major component of a relationship and so aslong as you maintain it you maintain your relationship.alot of humour can be brought out of sex if you look deep enuf, your partners body is a store of humour that you can use, just make a sexy seductive joke abouts yours or their body and see how fast the laughter will lead you two to the bedroom.have some naughty humour in your relationship ...


0 評論, 63 瀏覽次數, 2 票 ,1.04 分數
kinkycplincanon 53 伴侶(男人和女人)
5  文章
her,or so she says   2011-10-09

watching wife having her first girl/girl 69 in the back of our Subaru wagon . Let me set the story:i had hooked up my buddy with this girl who was staying with shannon and i.a mutual friend brought her over, asking if she could stay a few weeks. she was a tall redhead , kinda thick (in a good way)green eyes big full lips , sexy as hell and was very open about her bi-sexuality a true ...


7 評論, 571 瀏覽次數, 39 票 ,4.62 分數
xplodeu 48 男性
3  文章
Pitfalls vs Pussies?   2011-08-23

I'm just curious to know what women prefer in bed. I'm sure if your sitting at home right now with the moggy on your lap your gonna say pussy right? But if you had put pussy to bed 5 min ago, and walked into your bedroom, What would you be expecting to find?

A bottle of wine and chocolate, a whip or other? I understand everyone here states their preferences, but I'm seeking here ...


2 評論, 122 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,1.84 分數
takemeasiam74 50 男性
10  文章
humor   2011-08-13

we all need to laugh and humor can help us all relax, sexually it is v important


1 評論, 44 瀏覽次數, 7 票 ,2.02 分數
XG35 55 男性
4  文章
Bra Sizes   2011-07-27

Have u ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the Letters used to define bra sizes? But couldn't figure out what the letters stood for. Well its time you became informed! (A) Almost tits. ( Barely there. (C) Can't Complain! (D) Damn! (DD) Double Damn! (E) Enormous! (F) Fake. (G) Get a Reduction. (H )Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!




10 評論, 513 瀏覽次數, 36 票 ,4.45 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Noble King Arthur   2011-06-29

King Arthur

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur’s youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to ...


3 評論, 290 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,6.16 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Like a Tiger   2011-06-29

A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I’m not a virgin."

The husband replies, "That’s no big thing in this day and age."

The wife continues, "Yeah, I’ve been with one guy."

"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"

"Tiger Woods."

"Tiger ...


1 評論, 384 瀏覽次數, 11 票 ,3.35 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
The Old Farmer   2011-06-29

The old farmer sat rocking on the front porch as he talked to the stranger. "Been thirty years since I lost my wife in these woods."

"Oh, I’m sorry, " the stranger said, "It must have been hard to lose your wife like that."

"Hard?" the farmer snorted, "Was damn near impossible! She knew those woods like the back of her hand!"


1 評論, 382 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,3.64 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
the Big Game Hunter   2011-06-23

The big game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone about his hunting skills. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and none could dispute that. But then he said they could blindfold him and he would recognize any animal’s skin from it’s feel, and if he could locate the bullet hole he would even tell them what caliber bullet it was that killed the animal.

The hunter said ...


1 評論, 261 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,3.98 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Piece of Cake   2011-06-23

Little Johnny walked into the kitchen, saw his mother making a cake and announced, "I'm gonna go play in my room for a couple of hours. I sure would like a piece of cake after though!

Later, when his mother brought him a piece of cake, Little Johnny exclaimed, "Wow!, it worked!"

Puzzled, his mother asked, "What do you mean?"

Little Johnny replied, "Daddy said that in ...


1 評論, 298 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,4.12 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Sex at Seven   2011-06-23

A typical macho man married a typical good-looking redheaded lady and after the wedding, laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you ...


1 評論, 258 瀏覽次數, 5 票 ,3.14 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Two Friends   2011-06-23

Two friends, a blonde and a brunette, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the brunette happens to see her boyfriend buying flowers.

She sighs and says, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again...for no reason."

The blonde looks quizzically at her and says, "What’s the big deal, don’t you like getting flowers?"

The brunette says, "Oh ...


2 評論, 316 瀏覽次數, 10 票 ,4.78 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
"Joys of Parenting "   2011-06-22

A Woman's Experience With Children

For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious. For those who have children this age, this is not funny. For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning. For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

The following came from an anonymous mother.

Things I've learned from my children ...


2 評論, 275 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,5.63 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Women   2011-06-22

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. --Charlotte Whitton

Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. --Lenny Bruce

I love women. They're the best thing ever created. If they want to be like men and come down to our level, that's fine. --Mel ...


1 評論, 154 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,3.70 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Vacation   2011-06-22

A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn; his wife preferred to read. One morning the husband returned after several hours of fishing and decided to take a nap.

The wife, to escape her snoring husband, decided to take the boat out. Since she was not familiar with the lake, she rowed out to the middle, anchored the boat, and started ...


1 評論, 279 瀏覽次數, 6 票 ,5.36 分數
southernman5051 60 男性
6  文章
Starting a fight   2011-06-05

A wife and her husband were watching "Who wants to be a millionaire"while they were in bed.Husband turns to the wife and said Do you want to have sex?"NO" she answered.He then turns and ask, Is that your final answer? THis time without even looking at him simply reply "YES" So then husband turns and said ok I like to phone a friend" THen the fight started.


0 評論, 418 瀏覽次數, 17 票 ,2.42 分數
coolwinterclass 52 男性
5  文章
booted out   2011-06-03

A husband and his wife had a very bad argument.He left and went to the bar. when he home three sheets to the wind. He saw that all his clothes and tools were lying in the front yard. When seeing this through blurry eyes he stormed in the house and confronted wife."Bitch I know your leaving but you sure in hell are not taking my stuff with you"


2 評論, 371 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,3.68 分數
BabyBoomerBoy50s 73 男性
1  文章
Show Some Manners!   2011-04-17

True Story!

I used to have a girlfriend who would always want to reach for my dinner plate with her fork, or grab my drink, and just help herself......without even asking! If she would have at least asked first, I would have been gracious enough to concede.

The next time I was ready for her.

We were double dating with a friend of ...


0 評論, 56 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,1.96 分數
warINpieces 33 男性
1  文章
Have you ever farted during sex?   2011-04-06

My first one night stand EVER I accidently let one slip while she was blowing me. We laughed it off and I felt quite embarassed until 2 minutes later she let one go as I brought her legs over her shoulders. Girls do fart!


1 評論, 24 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,3.43 分數
SEEKING FOR THE RIGHT PERSON TO RELOCATE AND START A NEW LIFE WITH   2011-04-05

am looking to meet someone who is honest, sweet, caring, attractive, someone who is getting tired of the bar scene, someone who is looking for something that can turn into a long term relationship and possibly marriage.but 4months ago i met a guy on the internet promising me that he loves me and his from Africa and told me to come and visit him and i pay him a visit he take me to a hotel and ...


0 評論, 32 瀏覽次數, 3 票 ,2.45 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Infidelity Discovered   2011-03-14

A man was having an affair with another woman and his wife found out about it, so she told him "If you don't end it now I'm gonna go downtown to the post office where you work and tell everyone I see that you're a no good cheating filthy bum."

The husband replied "You're gonna go downtown to the post office where I work and tell everyone you see that I'm a no good cheating filthy bum?" ...


3 評論, 443 瀏覽次數, 19 票 ,2.46 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
The Garden of Eden   2011-03-14

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!"

"What's the problem, Eve?"

"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."

"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.

"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of ...


2 評論, 274 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,3.33 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Magic Frog   2011-03-14

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes."

The woman freed the frog and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes-that whatever you wish for, your husband will ...


4 評論, 240 瀏覽次數, 9 票 ,5.56 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
My Wife and I Were Happy For Twenty Years.......   2011-03-07

My wife and I were happy for twenty years...then we met.

. I just got back from a pleasure trip - I drove my wife to the airport

. After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice

. One woman says to another, "Isn't your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other woman ...


1 評論, 286 瀏覽次數, 4 票 ,2.47 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
the King   2011-03-07

The king was waving to his loyal subjects from the steps of the palace when he spotted a beggar in the crowd who looked, beneath the dirt and rags, amazingly like his royal self. He had a guard bring the beggar to him and the crowd was likewise struck by the remarkable resemblance. The king was amused, for he knew that the king before him had a well-deserved reputation as a ladies' man, as did he ...


1 評論, 172 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,2.40 分數
chicoT353 54 男性
1  文章
Red Flags and warning signs....   2011-03-07

Red flags and warning sign. Is this you because I look for these. If your new in town and ask me where the Methadone Clinic is.........Warning

If the police already know your description....... Warning

If you know the county jail system better than the sheriff.....warning

To date somebody. If you have to get cleared by CPS or a Judge.........Warning

I know we ...


1 評論, 48 瀏覽次數, 1 票 ,5.00 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Free Tattoo   2011-03-07

A man walks into a tattoo parlor and says he would like a $100 dollar bill on his dick. Well the tattoo artist laughs and says "I'll do it for free if you can give me one good reason for it."

The guy thinks for a second and says. "Well one, I like to keep my money in my pants, two I like to watch my money grow, and three I want to see how fast my wife can blow a $100.


1 評論, 202 瀏覽次數, 8 票 ,4.17 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Just Try to be Strong   2011-03-07

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an ...


3 評論, 225 瀏覽次數, 12 票 ,5.63 分數
josmith5 61 男性
1466  文章
Off to Hawaii   2011-03-07

There was a couple who were big over-spenders. They always dreamed to spend holidays in Hawaii, but were never able to save any money to do so. One day they came up with an idea--each time they had sex, they would put $20.00 bill into a piggy bank.

They bought the piggy, and followed that procedure for about a year. After that time, they decided that there was enough money for their ...


1 評論, 144 瀏覽次數, 0 票